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Entry for 05/22/05 @ 09:37:51 pm
Back in the basement... with another entry in the journal of Walter the Frankenstein monster. Sometimes, it really kills me, not being able to talk about Walter. Outside of Jerry, I don't know anyone else from high school any longer. There weren't many kids in the school that ever found out about our "monsters". Now, it's not something that I can talk about to anyone that I meet. I can write about it here. But still people don't understand.
Some relationships, some friendships, haunt us, sometimes for years after they have been severed. Especially when we weren't the ones to end it.
Case in point: There's a guy that I know that comes into the bookstore all the time. One night as we got to talking, like we normally do, I went on brake and stood outside with him while he had a cigarette . This guy's been married for a few years now. He's happy and he loves his wife. However, still, sometimes times he wakes up in the middle of the night after having dreamed of his ex-girlfriend. Nothing to graphic mind you, just dreams of having coffee or walking down the street. She met someone when she went away to college and eventually just stopped mailing him or returning his calls. She didn't even actually break up with him. Last he heard, she even married the guy. So, the relationship was severed, he moved on, got married himself, but for some unknown reason, their's a little piece of him that never fully recovered and is still hanging around to bother him now and again.
I thought about telling him about Walter. About my friend that just disappeared the last time I tried to go see him. About the fact, not knowing if Walter is alive or dead, my friendship has the same lack of closure that his does.
But I shut my mouth. Most people seem squeamish about bringing the dead back to life. As cool as he tries to come of, this guy is just another married man that needed an ear and I happened to be the ear that day. I'm not sure that he would have seen the similarities.